gosh

the weather is rainy today. gives me the same feeling i used to have during those loooooooong seemingly pointless days in junior high, where i felt that the vast majority of my day was pointless (music fucking class? i have a degree from McGill in piano. gym class? i already know how to play football. geography? ffs, we covered that in elementary school. not that there wasn't anything to learn, it just felt very, er, unenticing and meaningless...), and the school itself was dark, ancient, and filled with disenchanted teachers just riding out their tenure till pension. i ABHOR the union system in quebec, incidentally. knowing that unless he beats in the class clown's head with a tuba he can't be fired makes for a less than inspiring teacher.

anyhoo, today feels pretty much like that. oh! i just figured it out! this feeling is the result of having ZERO inspiration. see, my imagination is usually firmly in the driver's seat, which is why some tasks are appreciably more difficult for me than others. when i have no inspiration or creative juices flowing i feel like this. which, in hindsight, i suppose was my problem in junior high. nothing fascinated me or triggered any flights of fancy, apart from that sorta-cute girl Nancy.

hmmm...maybe they'll return. maybe i'll bring my laptop to a cafe later and see what stories lurk up in the attic of my brain. maybe.