to do
1- make offer to the ste-jerome guy. cross fingers!
2-make appointment with the ge folk. again, cross fingers!
3-follow up with downtown lawyers re:tomorrow's deadline. cross fingers thrice!
4-arrange, arrange, arrange.
wonder what my plans will be for the coming weekend... well, the Bears are playing N'awlins at 2 on sunday (all are more than welcome to come by for that, incidentally.), but apart from that, I haven't a clue. I must put some thought into that as well....oh yeah. fuck. i've a baptism to attend on saturday.
Here, for posterity, is my plan. I will send out a letter to all who know me, thusly:
Greetings, oh family, friends, and well wishers! As you must certainly know, we are neither married nor children-ed yet. If you act now, you can take advantage of this one time offer. Take care of all your future obligations, be they engagement party, bachelor party, bachelorette party (wtf? but that one's neither here nor there...), bridal shower, wedding ceremony, baby shower, and baptism. For one low low payment of 1000$ you can prepay for all these events. Included in that price will be token photographs of the events, pre-generated comments on the food by random other relatives for you to discuss with in the future, and a meaningless piece of crystal crap with "Carlo + Alise (Date Goes Here) engraved somewhere on it. But wait! That's not all! Included in your one time low low payment of 1000$ you are excused from attending each of these events! And there's more! In a fit of generosity, we're even throwing in all birthdays for both of us, for as long as we live! And speaking of living, we'll even throw in the funerals. You can sleep as soundly as the dead (all puns intended) knowing that your condolences have been expressed in advance, and your attendance at the funeral hall taken care of.
This, of course, is simply my perspective on things.
2-make appointment with the ge folk. again, cross fingers!
3-follow up with downtown lawyers re:tomorrow's deadline. cross fingers thrice!
4-arrange, arrange, arrange.
wonder what my plans will be for the coming weekend... well, the Bears are playing N'awlins at 2 on sunday (all are more than welcome to come by for that, incidentally.), but apart from that, I haven't a clue. I must put some thought into that as well....oh yeah. fuck. i've a baptism to attend on saturday.
Here, for posterity, is my plan. I will send out a letter to all who know me, thusly:
Greetings, oh family, friends, and well wishers! As you must certainly know, we are neither married nor children-ed yet. If you act now, you can take advantage of this one time offer. Take care of all your future obligations, be they engagement party, bachelor party, bachelorette party (wtf? but that one's neither here nor there...), bridal shower, wedding ceremony, baby shower, and baptism. For one low low payment of 1000$ you can prepay for all these events. Included in that price will be token photographs of the events, pre-generated comments on the food by random other relatives for you to discuss with in the future, and a meaningless piece of crystal crap with "Carlo + Alise (Date Goes Here) engraved somewhere on it. But wait! That's not all! Included in your one time low low payment of 1000$ you are excused from attending each of these events! And there's more! In a fit of generosity, we're even throwing in all birthdays for both of us, for as long as we live! And speaking of living, we'll even throw in the funerals. You can sleep as soundly as the dead (all puns intended) knowing that your condolences have been expressed in advance, and your attendance at the funeral hall taken care of.
This, of course, is simply my perspective on things.
posted by carlo at 6:11 AM
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